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This Will Kill You: A Guide to the Ways in Which We Go, by HP Newquist, Rich Maloof
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Have you been attacked by a great white shark? Gone over Niagara Falls in a barrel? Been exposed to anthrax? No, you haven't, or you'd be dead. This Will Kill You reveals the intriguing facts behind the many ways humans bite the dust in encounters with deadly bugs, hungry predators, natural disasters, and freak occurrences. Thoroughly researched and illustrated, not to mention thoroughly hilarious, this book describes in deathly detail what happens to the body when it's struck by lightning, slimed by a dart frog, or flung from a mountaintop.
No other book has ever peaked under the Grim Reaper's robe in such a straightforward and irreverent way. With a foreword by a physician at the Mayo Clinic, an afterword by a funeral director, lists of history's most notable deaths, and a unique death rating system, everything you need to know about the ways in which we go are included in these pages.
- Sales Rank: #1137734 in Books
- Published on: 2009-05-26
- Released on: 2009-05-26
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .78" w x 5.50" l, .70 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 352 pages
From School Library Journal
Adult/High School—In alphabetical order, with the occasional sidebar that seems unrelated to the immediate peril under discussion, the authors describe about 75 specific ways by which individuals can meet their demise. The causes range from the sadly ordinary (stroke) to the much-publicized but rare (alligators), the old-fashioned (hemlock poisoning), and the usually uncharted (playing professional sports). Each entry discusses the mechanics of the particular death (or extensive damage just short of death) the agent causes, as well as the likelihood of succumbing through this means. Data on death rates, parts of the world most afflicted, and notable victims ushered out by the method end each two-page write-up. Also included for each is a "horror factor" gauge that takes into consideration dread, likelihood, and gore, and a brief but useful list of "grim facts" that put the agent of death into place in history or current events. Illustrations are simple thumbnails—no gore. The potential audience for this book includes list lovers, horror fans, and even students engaged in history or science research. Sadly, there is no index.—Francisca Goldsmith, Halifax Public Libraries, Nova Scotia
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Review
“Irreverent yet informative…Makes a perfect preventive guide, breezy summer read, or ideal gift for your cousin, the hypochondriac.” ―Men's Fitness
“There's nothing like a beach read that graphically details exactly how a shark will chew you up. This book...not only explores the myriad ways in which we kick the bucket (pray you never get a Guinea worm infection), it dares to look at death in a lighthearted way. Sure, being burned at the stake is no fun, but reading about it is a hoot.” ―Boston Herald
“From syphilis to snakes, from alligators to anthrax, THIS WILL KILL YOU is a light-hearted look at the myriad ways we humans can depart this earth. It is an iconoclastic and informative romp through our last moments that will leave readers both informed and amused. I enjoyed it immensely.” ―Michael Collins, M.D., author of HOT LIGHTS, COLD STEEL and BLUE COLLAR, BLUE SCRUBS
About the Author
HP NEWQUIST is the author of more than a dozen books, including The Great Brain Book (a National Science Teachers' award winner), the Yahoo! Guide to the Internet (a Book of the Month Selection), and Here There Be Monsters. He is also the creator of the Celebrity Death Trio™, a popular blog that chronicles the passing of fabled icons--who always manage to die in threes.
RICH MALOOF is an editor and award-winning writer specializing in health, technology, and music with a dozen published titles to his credit. He is a front-page contributor to MSN.com, and has also written for CNN, Yahoo!, MSNBC, Women's Health, For Dummies, and Sterling Publications, among others.
Most helpful customer reviews
8 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
A witty and informative guide to the myriad ways in which we enter the Void
By M. Richardson
HP Newquist and Rich Maloof have coauthored this little-known gem of a book which plays off something every person possesses to a certain degree: morbid curiosity. Humans are both repelled and fascinated by the subject of death, and the dual-aspect of this tendency lies at the core of the book. The authorial tone is equal parts wittiness and sober reflection on the grisly realities that we as humans must learn to face. The back of the book says that the content is "irreverent," but I think nothing could be further from the truth. If the authors laugh, it is not a laugh of defiance or of superiority. Rather, being oh-so-human themselves, they know that they are just as susceptible as the rest of humankind is to the things they explain in quite some detail in their book. The book IS very amusing, no doubt, but it gallows humor through and through. And this is the key to the work - they are not prison wardens laughing in the face of dangerous prisoners who are unable to harm them. Rather, they function similarly to Virgil in Dante's Inferno: they lead us down on a tour through the hellish fates that potentially await us at some point in the foggy future. Only this time Virgil has a great sense of humor to help prevent us from being overwhelmed by the horror before our eyes.
I make this sound dramatic, but it really isn't. For all the grimness of the material, it has one advantage: the lightness which comes with accepting inevitability. This is reflected somewhat in the book's structure. This is not one single narrative work, but a long series of short chapters, each devoted to a certain potential death. Chapters on average are a mere 3-4 pages in length, making this book ideal for short spurts of reading. If you are one of those people who likes to enjoy literature on the toilet, or in the bathtub, or while waiting in line at the post office, or while waiting outside your child's school to pick this up, you'll find that this becomes your best friend. But it is also enjoyable in long sessions. I gulped this book down in three days when I first got it... and I'm a slow reader!
The authors do a good job of balancing more gritty, day-to-day reality type of stuff like heart attacks, seizures, stabbing, and HIV/AIDS with much less common fates (note, for instance, that the book has chapters on what happens when a space suit malfunctions, what happens when you go over the Niagara Falls in a barrel, and what happens when you become the snack of a Komodo Dragon). The main portion of the book is introduced by a foreword and an introduction, both of which are worth reading. Perhaps the most appreciated touch in the book is an inclusion called "two-minute med school" where the authors explain all of the medical jargon they use throughout the rest of the book (specific causes of death in each scenario are explored very thoroughly).
Each chapter ends with a set of subsections which give information on a) what a scenario is termed scientifically, b) the medical cause(s) of death, c) the time you should reasonably expect to be killed if such a scenario were to occur, d) the types of people most likely to die in this manner, e) the overall statistical lethality of the situation, f) kills per annum, g) overall historical death toll that can be attributed to that scenario, h) well-known people who have perished in those circumstances, i) a subjective "horror factor" rating on how horrific such a death is, and j) "grim facts," which are little asides which couldn't be reasonably included in the main entry but are still interesting and still pertain to the method of death.
Credit must also be given to Jim Shinnick for the frequently hysterical illustrations he provides throughout the book.
This is the best find I've made in a long time. I very randomly happened to stumble across this in a bookstore, and it was love at first sight. Highly recommended to anyone with an overpowering curiosity and a strong stomach.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
The Straight Skinny on Biting the Big One!
By Mike O'Connor
THIS WILL KILL YOU is an absolutely intriguing guide to the various ways homo sapiens can exit "this veil of tears." Authors H.P. Newquist and Rich Maloof dish up the facts on 76 - count 'em, 76! - ways to die ranging from black widow spiders to space suit malfunctions to gangrene. While some might find the topic morbid, I found it an entertaining and informative guide to a subject of importance to us all.
THIS WILL KILL YOU presents its magical misery tour contents alphabetically. The first entry is Alligators; the last, Working in a Coal Mine. Among the "ways to go" covered are Alzheimer's, Arsenic, Botulism, Burning at the Stake, the well-named Death Cap Mushroom, Binge Drinking, Ebola Virus, Going over Niagara Falls, the really revolting Guinea Worm, Hemlock, Komodo Dragon, Lions/Tigers/Bears, Nerve Gas, the Plague, Pufferfish, Radiation Exposure, Snakes, Stroke and Unscheduled Plane Landing. Each entry merits a four-page write-up with info on how that particular items kills, the medical cause of death, those at highest risk of dying from it, lethality, annual death tolls, historical death totals, notable victims, etc. Despite its grim subject matter, the tone is factual, straightforward and just a bit irreverant.
Each entry has an accompanying cartoon or two. If you're interested in photographs of what a victim of a shark attack, type 2 diabetes or syphilis looks like, this ain't the book for you; no pix!
All in all, I thought THIS WILL KILL YOU was - to borrow one of Mr. Spock's favorite words - fascinating. It might not be bedside reading but it is a great read. Recommended.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
educational, entertaining, and fantastically addictive
By jeni chen
This book was so good I keep searching for more. And unlike most books, once you finish it, it's still useful to have around as a reference, and doesn't sit pointlessly on a shelf gathering dust. Highly recommend!
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